Windshield Time (drafted 11/18/11; don't know why I didn't post it)

Well, it's been another interesting turn of events. As I sit here alone at home after another week of being on the road, and on my birthday, I felt it was time to post here. A LOT has happened since my last post (as usual), and I am still processing it all. And the long stretches of driving this week (aka "Windshield Time") have coalesced some things in my mind.

First and foremost, Dad did not last the year as he had hoped/expected. In the middle of September, his complaints of not having any energy and sleeping all the time accelerated. This ultimately led to a week-long hospitalization - a time during which it became apparent that there were no more interventions available to help Dad live well. We had many conversations about his wishes and, as that week transpired, it became clear that there was only one decision to be made.

So, on Friday, September 23, Dad had his final dialysis treatment and was returned to the his assisted living facility. We knew that my brother would be coming to town the following Monday, and the thought was that he would be able to come and spend time with Dad before his body finally shut down.

Over the weekend, hospice aided in keeping Dad comfortable. I fed him several meals and we had a few minutes of lucid conversation during that time. I reminded Dad that Bro was coming, and he seemed comforted by that.

Monday came, and Dad was mostly unresponsive. Bro arrived about 4:30 PM, and Dad and he had some good time together. After his alone time with Dad, we (Bro, me, hospice, and the floor manager) convened in at the foot of Dad's bed and were discussing options for Bro staying with Dad. The hospice nurse interceded and said we needed to pay attention to Dad. With Bro on one side, and me on the other, we watched Dad take his last breath and quietly pass.

It was weird. I have heard stories of folks who have said that a loved one waited for someone to arrive before "letting go". I have no doubt of that now.